Modern Middle Manager
Primarily my musings on the practical application of technology and management principles at a financial services company.
Happy Holidays!

Tuesday, December 24, 2002  

Merry Christmas, Happy Kwanzaa, et al. In an effort to keep everyone safe, I present for you The Rules of the Holidays:

1. Tequila is not your friend.
2. Neither is eggnog unless you are wearing Expand-o-Matic pants.
3. Yes, that shirt does look like a tablecloth. Ooh, same material, too. Just be polite to the giver and donate it later at 5x retail value.
4. The box enclosing the rabbit/hampster/guinea pig/mail-order bride should have airholes in it.
5. Never purchase clothes, books, music or DVD's for your friends and family. Either you have no taste or they don't. Gift certificates are good. Cash is best.
6. Corollary to #5: "Personal Gifts" don't exist. Nobody is going to remember fondly that you gave them that three-eyed orange fish ceramic knife holder because they liked the Simpsons.
7. Corollary to #6: In fact, they will begin to develop a nasty, bitter grudge against you.
8. Keep the political and religious discussions out of the mix unless you are drawn to fistfights and broken furniture. In that case ignore rule #1.

Stay safe and leave the automatic weapons at home!

posted by Henry Jenkins | 12/24/2002 03:54:00 PM

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